? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
