Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
