You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
