I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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