i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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