yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
