What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
