i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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