Me too!
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize