I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
