Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
