wat bout pragnant strippers??
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
