Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
barbara walters just said penis...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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