would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
