pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
