Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize