You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
