my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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