You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Randomize
