marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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