Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
