i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
