My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
