Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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