It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
