We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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