im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
