I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
