Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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