dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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