I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
