I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
