what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
