cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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