we're blogging at a bar
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
