u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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