I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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