just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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