Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
