im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
