you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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