She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
