Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
