I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
