Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
