How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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