found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
