theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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