No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize