I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
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